These Minutes Are Minutiae
(Golf Course | Ontario, Canada)(I work in the pro shop at a golf course, and people often call to make tee times. Note that our tee times are spaced 8 minutes apart.) Me: “Hello, this is [golf course]....
View ArticleViva La Revelation
(Call Center | Florida, USA)(It’s the 4th of July, and I’m 9.5 hours into my 10-hour shift. For the umpteenth time today, a customer asks why I’m working on the 4th of July.) Me: “Welcome to [credit...
View ArticleFYI Your ETA Is TBA, So TTYL
(Tech Support | AZ, USA)(I am dealing with a pushy customer; he’s submitted a trouble ticket but called in less than two minutes asking for an update.) Me: “Sir, I am unable to give an ETA at this...
View ArticleTime To Sign Up For Delivery By Delorean
(Newspaper | USA)(I’m answering the main line at a busy newspaper on a Saturday.) Me: “[Newspaper], this is [name].” Caller: “Yeah, it’s dark out.” Me: “…Okay?” Caller: “Yeah, it’s… what time is it?”...
View ArticleBeauty Is In The Eye Of The Bequeather
(Cafe | Sydney, Australia)(Most customers at the café where I work are regulars, including an older couple who comes in every Saturday. The wife is slightly disabled and has a mild facial...
View ArticleDelivered In A Dog Day Afternoon
(Pet Store | Burbank, CA, USA)(A customer comes up to my register in the morning, a little bit after opening. The guy who does the ordering is standing next to me.) Customer: “I got a call that my dog...
View ArticleNo Wait To Her Argument
(Clinic | Columbus, OH, USA)(I’m running slightly late to meet a patient. I arrive about five minutes after the appointment time to find no one there. I wait around, wondering if she was perhaps caught...
View ArticleDon’t Feed It Rock, Paper, Scissors Or Spock
(Pet Store | OR, USA)(A customer comes in and explains that her daughter caught a lizard. People frequently come in for advice on their wild-caught animals, so I start explaining what proper care would...
View ArticleHe’ll Be Back In The Future
(Retail | Ireland)(A regular customer comes up to me. He’s notorious for being rude, ignoring what we say to him and just generally wasting our time.) Regular: “Can you look up a music DVD for me?” Me:...
View ArticleSanta Vs Jason
(Fast Food, Restaurant | Campbellton, NB, Canada)(Our restaurant is promoting several new products for the holidays, and the lobby and seating area are festively decorated. Two young women walk in with...
View ArticleWe Love To Deep Dish On Bad Customers
(Pizza Delivery | UT, USA)(It is five minutes to closing at our store when the phone rings. Policy requires that we answer until 11:30 during winter hours. I pick up and my friend and manager stands...
View ArticlePointedly Pointing Out Appointments
(Medical Office | CO, USA)(I am a receptionist taking calls for a very busy doctor.) Caller: “Hi, I need to schedule an appointment with the doctor.” Me: “Okay. Can I have your name, please?” Caller:...
View ArticleWeekly Roundup: The March Of Time
Weekly Roundup | Not Always RightWeekly Roundup: The March Of Time. As March marches to a close, this week we feature five stories about a different type of march: the March of Time! Time To Sign Up...
View ArticleQuick To Find Fault With Being Quick To Finding Fault
Tech Support | Manchester, England, UKMe: “Hello. IT Help Desk. [My Name] speaking. How can I help?” Caller: “Yes. I logged a job the other day. It’s been resolved already, so I’d just like to close...
View ArticleTime Waits For No Chinaman
Thrift Store | TX, USA(An older customer approaches my cash register.) Customer: “Did you know that all the reality TV shows you watch today are 35 years old?” (I look up to see if he was joking as...
View ArticleNeeds To Give That Caller A High-Five
Customer Services | Hampshire, England, UK(It’s about 4:45 pm. We have a strict rule about not taking yourself off the phone until 5 pm exactly. People still do, but it’s a gamble. The earlier you take...
View ArticleVery Slow To Register
Supermarket | NY, USA(I’m heading to the only open checkout lane of a supermarket. A man in his mid-thirties, visibly in a rush and carrying only a single carton of milk, gets there only a moment after...
View ArticleDoesn’t Live In The Real World
Retail | USA(I’m the manager of a watch store in a mall. I am taking care of some display work when a couple walks up to my kiosk.) Me: “Hi there! Is there anything I can help you find today?”...
View ArticleAppointment Disappointment
Retail, Portrait Studio | Chicago, IL, USA(I work in a retail portrait studio that gets very busy during the holiday season. It is a busy Saturday, and we are completely booked. A woman walks in with...
View ArticleBeat The Clock
(Repair Shop | OH, USA) Warning: explode() [function.explode]: Empty delimiter in /home/aznbbj/public_html/wp-content/themes/notalwaysright/functions.php on line 192 Warning: Invalid argument supplied...
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